Which Horrifying Medieval Mermaid Are You?
May 30, 2017 at 5:00 pm
#Mermay is almost over — do you know what kind of eldritch medieval mer-human most resonates with your personality? This quiz will help you determine your place in the aquatic feudal pecking order.
Choose a horrible Medieval fate:
Sailing off the edge of the world
The ire of a vindictive feudal lord
Becoming cosplay inspiration for a Ren Faire
Are you a witch?
I can’t swim
Choose a medieval-ish food:
Giant roast pig with an apple in its mouth
Flagon of ale from the ol’ tavern
An apple stuffed with roasted pig
Choose a viewpoint:
Nunc est bibendum (“Now is the time to drink”)
Memento mori (“Remember that you must die”)
You spot a caravel full of sailors on the horizon. What do you do?
Lure them to your island and use them to host your horde of mer-spawn
Drag them to the briny depths
Wave goodbye; you don’t have time to waste humoring the whims of mortal men
Challenge them to a game of Sea Twister; if they win you allow them safe passage through your dominion
Force them to come to your open mic night
Boil them & eat them
Pick a non-mermaid half-human abomination:
Smug Ass Dragon
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Which Medieval Mermaid Are You?
But I'm also %%personality%%