Dogges:
- Organic vacuums
- Fluffy garbage dowsing rods
- Wheezing footrests
- Nature’s designated Hufflepuffs
- Fart auditors
- Pizza alarm
- Pillows that can drool on themselves
- Barf mops (alternatively, Swiffer Mops that spray barfed-up grass instead of water)
- Crumb sleuths
- Toddler steeds
- Hairy doorstops
- The only thing keeping cats from supreme domination
- Mostly-willing recipients of spinsters’ affection
- The only evidence for a benevolent higher power
- Human thundershirts
- Keepers of knowledge #illumipuppi confirmed
