A Very Chilling Sabrina Roundtable: Season 3, Episode 4

Welcome to A Very Chilling Sabrina Roundtable: a recap series where we chat about the chills, thrills, and top shelf witchery in Netflix’s The Chilling Adventures of Sabrina. Hope y’all like haunted carnivals, rude party guests, and Symbolism because this episode was packing extra helpings of all three!


CC: so, right off the bat, can I say one thing?
I just love the moon and honestly she was Wronged in this episode

Jenny: lol

CC: the moon deserves better
that’s my stance

Jenny: the moon did nothing wrong

Rachel: she did not ask to be apart of this drama

CC: bless her
ANYway I know that doesn’t quite work as a summary

Jenny: the cw does midsommar
^summary

CC: L O L
a++++++

Rachel: lol i haven’t seen midsommar but now i guess i don’t have to, because i’ve seen this

Jenny: lol bless
but no – sabrina et al are finally working on a plan to bring power back to their coven; zelda’s being a dick about it, but ambrose and our girl hilds have come up w a way to charge themselves in the light of the Hare Moon EXCEPT that a bunch of asshole pagans who might just straight up be themselves greek mythological figures (?) decide to take over the coven bc they can sense weakness?

CC: so rude

Jenny: i’m not even really sure why the pagans want to convert the coven? like, they seem like they’re doing fine on their own

Rachel: oh yeah, this idea of “pagan witches” vs “satanic witches”, and how satanic witches drove out the pagan witches with the rise of christianity
this is what happens when you have to escalate the stakes so much after you’ve beaten satan

Jenny: LOL
just so

CC: I guess the greek pantheon = elder gods now??
I mean, I guess I can live with that honestly
spare us the unnecessary season about cthulhu, please
they’re so overexposed these days

Jenny: idk idk i think they’re trying to draw a distinction between the false god, the old gods, and the elder gods

Rachel: oh maybe we’ll get a lore olympus crossover

Jenny: i think they’re really going to still go hard on the lovecraft stuff
but GOD
RACHEL
YES

Rachel: LOLLL
everybody’s hot in lore olympus, so it would make sense they’d come to greendale where everybody is also hot

Jenny: yes yes yes yes yes
speaking of hot

Jenny: “warm fresh exposed flesh”
really gets me going
“hoochie coochie”
these are all things people say to intrigue and arouse
definitely this is human sex

CC: barbecued people meat
uh I mean
flesh, exposed to the elements
hottttttt

Jenny: the hot hot elements

CC: so, now that we know the carnies are all pagan witches

CC: really puts some of these signs in context LOL

Jenny: LOLOLOLOLOL
ok but i would like to mention at this point that i am a little unclear about the difference between these pagan witches and the gods they worship??
like, the main guy seems like straight up pan?? is that #confirmed in text?
and like, the refers to the spider woman as circe??

CC: just going off this sign in my screenshot, I’d hazard a guess they draw power from zeus himself???
(also: subtle)

Jenny: LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL

Rachel: yeah and the very subtle medusa ref with the snake lady

Jenny: right??
and is it just a ref or is she meant to be actual medusa??

Rachel: is this actually like a sandman situation where all gods are real and in constant conflict with each other?
RAS just started reading Neil Gaiman

Jenny: LOL

CC: it’s funny you say that bc during this episode I had the distinct thought that EVERYBODY really DID read Circe last year lol
(the madeline miller book I mean)
but I guess we all took different lessons away from it!!!!!!!
I do not want a zeus cameo lol
oh dang y’all
that really gets me thinking about how last time, we noticed Lilith’s pomegranate applique
maybe they’re getting at how all these mythologies overlap? like, maybe Lilith would be Persephone, or something like that???

Jenny: 👀👀👀👀👀
i wouldn’t not be into it
but also if that doesn’t happen i will be disappointed
hire cc, netflix
but also this ep especially felt like a book report
or like, four or five book reports all smushed together
like

Jenny: the wax figure shit is straight out of something wicked this way comes — the main haunted carnival text

Rachel: lol this looked so bad
also v confusing cause medusa turns people into stone
i guess off-brand medusa can only do wax

Jenny: LOL

CC: lollllllll
actual medusa wouldn’t be caught dead in a CARNIVAL

Jenny: LOLOLOLOL

CC: so speaking of medusa
what did y’all think of Harvey going Full Archie this episode
smh

Jenny: out here with a GUN
and he didn’t even have to get a shitty fake id to buy it

CC: without ros this team really can’t get anything done

Jenny: lol v fair
stick to your excellent sweaters, theo

CC: you’ve gone soft now that there’s a boy with cool hair

Rachel: honestly theo remains the only good dude
ambrose, nick, and harvey all slid in this episode
robin is obviously a fishman and we know not to trust him

Jenny: lol it is known

CC: i live in hope for this reveal

Rachel: i do wanna talk about nick though

Jenny: oh man oof

CC: yeah…….
does this show take his trauma seriously, or not?????

Jenny: deeply unclear

Rachel: it’s very hard to tell!!!!!

Jenny: he def went on a journey this ep

Jenny: a lot of exploring his feelings
a lot of punishing himself and also other people
and really no one is handling it well

Rachel: nick is obviously suffering and it makes me so mad at sabrina for being so oblivious
like, she loves him and she cares and she wants him to be normal
but i also really felt bad for her when he exploded
😢

Jenny: man for sure — it’s like, she keeps trying to be bright and happy and distract him from the bad stuff, but then she’s offended that he doesn’t talk to her about the bad stuff, and when she does finally bring it up it felt like it was too late?
and also

Jenny: this was p harsh
even though i def see where he’s coming from??
like, he didn’t know what he was signing up for, but at the same time he is the one who signed up for it

CC: yeah like:
no one is worth that?????
maybe that needs to be said?????

Jenny: a good point

CC: I mean on one hand, even by high school standards, these two had been dating for like five minutes when all this went down
but on the other: I don’t think this horrible trauma he endured wouldn’t have been any better if they’d been together longer??????
idk this show doesn’t seem like it’s exactly on solid footing when it comes to this storyline
for many reasons beyond relationship duration ha ha ha

Jenny: yeah i really don’t know where they’re trying to go or what they’re trying to say w it
but definitely idk if the solution is to put him through 30-days-worth of rehab in a single excruciating day

Rachel: i will say, that the guy who plays nick did a really good job in this particular scene

Jenny: he did
i remember thinking that he really committed and i respected it

Rachel: it was the most engaged i had been in a while

Jenny: lol v fair
speaking of ruthless takedowns though
can we talk about zelda?

Rachel: oh yes please

Jenny: i feel like she Also went on a journey
from this to thanking sabrina and hilda for the work they put into this moon bath plan

CC: you know, honestly, I think even the scene where she guilt trips hilda is character growth
from season 1 anyway
back in the day, she’d just kill hilda or make her do what she wanted anyway
she’s dealing with her feelings! messily and imperfectly, but still!!!!
is that a generous way to view it: probably!
but it’s what I’m going with here LOL

Jenny: i like that interpretation!
i’m inclined to be generous w zelda, if only bc i have so much respect and affection for eowyn
i do think she is one of the better-written characters
esp w stuff like this

Jenny: like excuse me — who wanted to be high priestess?
feels v real to criticize someone else for doing better at the thing you’re trying to do

CC: hey — she did say that it wasn’t inherently a bad thing, to be fair!

Rachel: true on all counts

Jenny: she said sabrina took it too far
which, like, who gets to decide that?

Rachel: honest i love someone actually calling sabrina out

Jenny: oh v true

Rachel: she acts a lot like she’s doing things for other people
which like, yes, she is
but also, she does things because she’s selfish and she wants to
and she dresses it up in this kind of martyr/hero cloak

Jenny: and i esp love that the writers are actually making it this clear!
and that can be p harmful

CC: also zelda was being Extremely A Mom in this scene and I was living for it
where are the parents?????
for once
right here, babyyyyyy

Jenny: but i’m p excited to see where this is headed for her (sabrina)
like — would love to see her really grapple w these feelings
maybe recognize some stuff about herself
love this arc for sabrina — might make me actually like her
even if the stuff she recognizes is bad

Rachel: 100% agree!!

CC: +1!

Jenny: lol thank
but also i have fallen into this trap before!
idk if it’s a good idea to hope/trust in these writers!bc they pull shit like this

Jenny: lazy!
explain yourselves!

CC: “it is not the time to question traditions,” says zelda, while questioning literally — LITERALLY — ALL OF THE TRADITIONS
i just loved that I got to have a cameo in this episode honestly

CC: ^ me, just getting from one episode of this show to the next

Jenny: LOL

CC: dorian wakes up every day wishing he could be joanne the scammer and you know what? i’m into it. I think I’m into it.

Rachel: lol i had 100% forgotten that they’d just been keeping an angel in jail this whole time

Jenny: oh v same
looks like they rewatched the first two season before they started writing
which like — good for them
growth

CC: angel ex machina

CC: how do you say “painting” in latin LOL
angel ex tabula?????

Jenny: LOL
i’ll take it
probably as close as

Jenny: sounds real
i’m sold

Rachel: love just putting two words together and making it a true thing

Jenny: lolololololol

Rachel: and good on ambrose for delivering that line without faltering

Jenny: truly

CC: real 100% bonafide occult science

Jenny: lololol
are y’all ready for final thoughts?

Rachel: yes!

CC: yes!
y’all mind if I go first?

Jenny: hell yeah
praise lilith
do it

CC: POV: pagan carnies after slicing up that cake into beautiful moon-shaped pieces and then eating chonks of it anyway

Jenny: lol bless
was truly so petty
to take this gift — this peace offering
to turn it against them

Rachel: it’s a new level of pettiness that i do truly respect

CC: i don’t! you don’t get to eat the apology cake if you don’t accept the apology!
it’s against the laws of nature

Jenny: LOL

CC: you’ll get yours, carnies!!!!
your just desserts

Rachel: lolllll
ok so my final thought is more of a rumination, and a question
how many musical numbers do you think we’re gonna get this season? at least one an episode?

Jenny: oh i think so

Rachel: and also, i would like to put a bet that there is at least one high school talent show

CC: nooooooo

Rachel: and maybe it is the climax of the season

Jenny: aaaaahhhhhhh

Rachel: and they all have to do a song together

CC: AHHHHHH

Rachel: sabrina takes lead vocals
nick gets keyboard
the wyrd sisters do backup vocals

Jenny: i would love to see it

Rachel: there’s just gotta be some reason why they’re going so hard on the musical stuff this season
and that is the only thing i can think of that would make any sense out of it

Jenny: well i think you’re putting more thought into it than they are, frankly
would love to see some kind of logical explanation in the text
but alas
which brings me to my final thought
you know how at the end of a sitcom, everything has to revert back to the status quo bc of how reruns worked, structurally, but also bc at some point it’s probably easier for the writers when they know they’re always starting from the same premise?

Jenny: i guess the church of lilith is over??
praise satan again??

CC: ugh
never
NEVER

Rachel: 👿

CC: praise hilda or bust!!!!


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Carolynn Calabrese

Carolynn Calabrese

If you prick your finger and write “Cat Fancy” on your mirror during a harvest moon, CC will appear behind you and make you put human clothes on your pets. CC is Head Crone in Charge at POMEgranate Magazine, as well as the co-host of Moon Podcast Power MAKE UP!!
Jenny Mott

Jenny Mott

Jenny is just a Silly Nerd with a lot of Feelings about Comic Books and Friendship and also This Capitalist Yoke We All Share; she enjoys Dogs and Sleeping and Cartoons. Her three favorite words are: Breakfast All Day.
Rachel Weiss

Rachel Weiss

Rachel is a designer and artist from Texas. She is pro-feminism, pro-crones, and pro-dogs. She's also Boss Crone at POMEgranate Magazine, and one day hopes to be able to drink her tea without so much milk and sugar.
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