Welcome back to Romance Roundtable: Bridgerton Edition. Join us to shout about dowagers in conflict, Mom Featherington: Scam Goddess, and our two beautiful, dumb leads’ increasingly bad decision-making as this season begins to draw to a close. And of course, be warned: spoilers for the first four episodes of Bridgerton Season 2 lie ahead!
CC: first and foremost, happy birthday to ME and bridgerton is giving me the gift I always wanted
milf featherington romance plot
CC: let us not forget
CC: a line that absolutely would work on me 100% of the time, love to see aspiring wife guy behavior
Jenny: i mean, on the one hand, i love this for her; but on the other hand i don’t trust this guy
CC: I do NOT trust him i just want to believe
Jenny: fair and reasonable
Ashley: at the very least, she’s getting some well-deserved attention
Rachel: the love of two scammers
good for them
CC: she’s getting something [i truly hope]
Jenny: yeah and honestly masterminding this large-ish-scale fraud to keep her family in society
Jenny: truly she is surrounded by idiots
yeah i mean tbf anyone who is investing in RUBY MINES in GEORGIA like, deserves it
CC: it’s simple: she deserves their money; i will not be taking questions at this time
Jenny: oh agreed
CC: also a wedding almost happened and then didn’t L O L
Jenny: for the best
Ashley: oh??? a wedding you say??????? you mean THE wedding of THE season??
Rachel: what could go wrong
Jenny: really no better way to ensure that this will be an absolute disaster
Ashley: i really would have been like… now wait a minute…
Jenny: but before we get to the wedding itself, there was a whole episode of lead-up to the wedding
CC: oh yeah! w h o o p s
Jenny: a whole episode of anthony consistently trying to ha ha unless his way out of it
Rachel: god, they’re both so hot and dumb
Jenny: she won’t let him do it!!
he gives her every opportunity and at each one she is just
you said you’d marry my sister and you had better fucking do it bc she loves you man!!
which, like, i also love edwina and want her to be happy. BUT!!!
really caught in a tough spot between believing her when she says she wants anthony but not trusting her with all of the information to really inform that decision
re: kate’s being in love w him and also the weird inheritance contrivance
CC: which i guess is nbd now that giles and his wife are taking their money and going home
this dude, man
playing nothing but assholes for 20 years but he will still always be giles to me lol
Ashley: here’s what REALLY gets me: kate really thinks her moving back to india would be enough to make anthony forget about her??? ANTHONY???? poster child taurus?
holy shit i didn’t even NOTICE that was giles my god
i was so focused on the trainwreck
CC: yeah he looks like scrooge [not mcduck]
Jenny: important clarification — not mcduck
Ashley: but anyway… mf anthony bridgerton would SWIM to india to get a piece
Jenny: it’s true it’s true he is too stubborn
CC: LMAO ashley
Ashley: AM I WRONG
lol perfect evidence
Rachel: in this moment
all i felt was
good for you girl (eventually)
(once you get your shit together)
(this man apparently knows what to do)
CC: lol i hope so, he’s talking a good game
what if she was just like
yeah man i’m 27 years old i have a good idea
that’s not how things worked in 181X or w/e but still, lmao. lol.
Jenny: no one had to explain masturbation to her at least
couldn’t live through another one of those scenes
as much as i love seeing beautiful people absolutely mortified
Ashley: in contemporary times, kate would’ve clapped back with “yeah i did FIVE of them to YOUR MOM”
Jenny: i would have loved to see that
honestly good for milf bridgerton
but to be fair she had her own drama brewing in these episodes
a little dowagers spat
Jenny: lady d could’ve told milf b about the inheritance plot, but she didn’t bc it wasn’t REALLY her business, but they’re friends! and it affects violet, so she felt betrayed!
honestly this was one of the dramas that made the most sense to me
i could see both sides
CC: TRUE but, BUT: it really isn’t like they are hurting for the dowry lol
i know it’s the principle of the thing tho to be fair
Jenny: yes it’s more about the betrayal than the material i think
but i do think they made up
CC: no secrets between dowagers ;__;
and when lady d is in a tight spot w the queen
Jenny: after the wedding (obviously) bombs
and the queen blames lady d for vouching for edwina
tells lady d to fix it
truly whomst among us would have ANY idea how to salvage this situation
Ashley: omg okay actually my heart actually twisted
Jenny: yes!! and so did violet’s!!
and so they are friends again
can’t stay mad when your bestie is going through it
nothing to do but get the giggles and make fun of stupid birds together
peacocks are really vicious lol, incredible choice
Jenny: it’s true it’s true
also in the lead up to the wedding
not only is anthony trying to get out of it at every turn
but he’s also making an ass of himself at the lake
Jenny: gets jealous bc some other boy takes kate on a boat ride
Ashley: well. we had to get this tightwad’s shirt off SOMEHOW
that is the important part
CC: his paper shirt
made out of PAPER
Rachel: we deserve this darcy emerging from the lake moment
Jenny: when kate pulls her hand away from his, he recoils like he’s been slapped, trips over poor newton, and falls in the water
Rachel: bless us, every one
CC: i tried so hard to get a good screenshot of this scene
Jenny: it was hard!!
the best i could do was this angry wet cat
CC: just stop moving the camera u cowards!!!!
truly, i feel like this shirt could not have been doing much even while dry
i’m sure textiles have just uh, come a really long way
Jenny: as has he!!
bc by the end of this ep
when he is YET AGAIN trying to call off this engagement
he speaks the words i have ever longed to hear from him
finally he admits that his mother knows best
CC: see i feel like he keeps leading with “break off the engagement” but he can’t keep breaking up with her and also trying to make out at the same time!!!!
to your earlier point about anthony “ha ha … unless” bridgerton
u really summed him all up!
Jenny: oh yeah he does not have a long-term plan
he has not thought any of this through
CC: now that, that i definitely agree with
oh, so one other thing in the pre-wedding episode
i want to circle back on before we really get into the wedding stuff
so much newsie screentime!
Jenny: eloise goes to an assembly to hear people speak about the rights of women and workers!
but also to chat up this newsie!!
CC: yeah she read his blog!
Jenny: i mean, you are technically correct
Rachel: thats a fake ass name
that’s the name of every OC of every 13 year old ever
CC: LOL rachel
Jenny: she read his blog and then negged him about it!!
Rachel: that’s the way to do it, imo
Ashley: i haaaaaate this plotline lol ngl
i recoil every time!!!!!!!!!!!!
Jenny: i mean, it is lipservice
i do not think that eloise is going to be leading any workers revolutions
or even volunteering for charities/organizing seamstress unions a la tipping the velvet
CC: i have mixed feelings about it
on one hand:
on the other hand:
idk complicated feelings about hot guy as syllabus LOL
Jenny: v fair
CC: complicated in that you can absolutely learn from cute people you date but also i would like eloise to find her way to more meaningful ideological ground on her own but also: this is bridgerton LOL
Jenny: i think the show can say explicitly that eloise’s radical nature is not an accomplishment she has acquired to help her gain a husband, but if the action of the plot does not support that point…
idk they’re not really getting themselves out of it
all that said…
CC: yeah ty having a hard time explaining what I meant!!! bless
also sneaking out of the wedding to hang w newsie
Jenny: and when she leaves the wedding to go confess her feelings!!
it was a cute scene
Jenny: sometimes, when i read stuff, i find i want to talk to you about the stuff i read. do you…also?? have these thoughts???
Jenny: and he does!
he read some books and set them aside for her bc he wants to hear what she has to say about them!!
just two babbies who learned how to read
Ashley: they are babbies, i should cut them some slack
but okay, we’re halfway through this thing
WEDDING??? LITERALLY TRAPPED IN A CLOSET????????????
Jenny: lol YES
Jenny: whomst among us
Ashley: you just got here kate!!!! lol
so relatable tho, truly
this was me on the floor of the shitty beach hotel room when my ex showed up to the prom afterparty and i willingly gave up my spot on the bed
CC: that sounds like an awful prom experience – the prom version of this whole wedding imo
Jenny: yes, certainly who HASN’T had a breakdown in a closet
but also yeah! the wedding itself! beautiful! extravagant! harry styles is playing! (is there anything classier??)
CC: the unhinged series of decisions that led us to this point, truly
anthony hallucinating that kate is the one he is marrying
Jenny: anthony hallucinating that there is no one else in the church but him and kate
CC: anthony going in for a long hand hold only for edwina to see the way he looks at her sister like he is about to devour her whole with his eyeballs
Jenny: kate’s bangle falls off and anthony rushes to pick it up
Rachel: also, edwina’s perception roll here was off the charts
Ashley: FINALLY although come on, very low DC
CC: [you cannot fast travel when there are enemies present]
Jenny: but honestly i was so proud of her in the episode!!
CC: yeah hell yeah edwina, just completely crushing this episode
in her princess serenity wedding dress
gorgeous, i personally love 2 see it
Jenny: love to see her absolutely body everyone who has ever kept anything from her
Jenny: sick of this shit — you can’t make decisions for me any more!!
Ashley: yes YES the tiger is out!!!
Jenny: LOL YES
Rachel: very big little sister energy, but in a good way
Jenny: and don’t think i haven’t forgotten about YOU anthony
Rachel: i am hootin and hollerin
CC: anthony’s terrible speech to try and entice edwina into marrying him tho
mr collins level failure
it was rough
Ashley: I SWEAR it felt like the beginning of this wedding to this scene felt like FIVE HOURS
i was SWEATING BULLETS
i kept thinking
how much longer is this episode??? they’re really going thru with this??? what??? what is happening?
Ashley: we need a “it’s happening” gif but instead of ron paul it’s anthony bridgerton and it says “what is happening”
Jenny: lol yes
and it just turns out
Ashley: nailed it
thank GOD for edwina!!!!!!!!!!
CC: wiser and braver than everyone on this show
winning over the queen just by being a kind and perceptive person
not accepting any more lies (as y’all have pointed out)
i love this for her
Ashley: omg, the scene with the king. god tier.
Jenny: the bar is truly so low for these idiots (but also edwina is genuinely a gift)
CC: the scene with the king truly got me choked up
CC: love that edwina proves that yet again lady danbury stays winning; continues to have impeccable taste
Jenny: really she saved lady d’s ass here, i think
Ashley: the elegance and compassion, absolutely unmatched
CC: queen charlotte is gonna be rustling up her ye olde rolodex for another hot royal cousin like she tried to hook daphne up with
CC: is that guy single? did he get married off?
Ashley: he IS single
Jenny: are we predicting the return of egg prince?
CC: i am, he was nice
Rachel: oh i hope so
he deserves an egg queen
Rachel: i have one more person i wanna talk about
before we wrap
well, two people
Jenny: i know!!
she was right — you care for me, you would never forsake me!!
he’s finally starting to figure it out!!
Rachel: Colin, finally doing something good!!
this better not backfire
this better not be like a
“you will never forsake me — because we are BEST BUDS”
i’m warning you, colin
ah friendship!! those are the only bonds that can never be broken
CC: colin in the next episode like
i just lost a year of my life to that fb post
Ashley: BIGGEST OOOF AHHHHH
Jenny: yes yes the psychic damage i have taken
i have a final thought but i do want to mention before we get there
episode 6 very much does end with
Jenny: no more mouth breathing
finally mouth touching
CC: and also!!!! pen’s secret identity has been revealed!!!
no longer safe behind the cronesona!!!
Rachel: i don’t think it has!!
i think they think it’s eloise!
whoops I misread
Rachel: cause that footman followed her to the printer’s
CC: LOL oh no, OH NO
Ashley: yeah i think they’re signaling eloise for sure
Jenny: oh lol strap in my dude
CC: i still have not watched ahead
and it is very difficult yall
Jenny: one more week!
Rachel: that is the best part of doing romance roundtable
it means i can watch 2 more
CC: LOL agreed
Rachel: i mean, obviously i watched the kissing parts
but like, the rest
i am stoked for
Jenny: lol the plot is not quite as good as the kissing parts
but still there’s a lot going on
Ashley: idk… i beg to differ! there is lots of yelling to come!
CC: kissin & hollerin continues
but with that….y’all ready for final thoughts?
Jenny: lol yes join us next week for the final installment of kissing and hollering
yes! final thoughts!
Ashley: yes!! y’all mind if i go first this week?
Jenny: go for it
CC: please do!
Ashley: okay my final thought is
Ashley: this just captures everything about this wedding for me
what is happening? why is this necessary? why is no one moving? oh wait now they’re moving
what year is it?? we simply DON’T KNOW and have no way of knowing
Jenny: living statue as a metaphor for this pacing
Ashley: to be clear, i enjoyed every second
being justifiably angry and judgmental is like, one of my favorite feelings
CC: i mean amen
CC: my final thought is much more shallow
CC: butterfly meme: is this a trend?
Rachel: is this: the female gaze
god i love to be catered to
Jenny: netflix knows what the people want
this only brings into clearer relief that anthony needs to be DIRTIER tho
few can be as LORGE but make it GRIMY
heavy is the head that wears the spirit halloween wig
Jenny: lol yes
speaking of the female gaze though
my final thought is just
Jenny: benny’s art school adventures
he is the artist, he is the model
he learns that
Jenny: i read some plot summaries online, so i know his book is next up, BUT
i really hope that they switch the order around a little to give benny some more time to really explore
the extent to which one form is much like another
in a bi way
Ashley: ….. 👀
b for bi!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
CC: we’ve gotten the main regency tropes out of the way right, we can just go nuts from here
Rachel: also i would not be mad if they gender swapped his romance
Ashley: seriously, let’s go
CC: v excited for next season’s predictions he he he
Rachel: so my final thought is a gift, really
for y’all and all our readers
Rachel: “official playlist”
go nuts on these classically styled bangers
Jenny: oh my god i cannot believe i didn’t mention earlier
Jenny: this absolutely killed me
Rachel: lol yes!!!
every one of these is a gift
Jenny: love to know i can now listen to this WHENEVER!!!
CC: amazing, love this for us
Join us next time for even more love story shouting in our next Romance Roundtable! In the meantime, Monthly Ko-Fi members: head on over to Ko-Fi for just a few bonus goofs that didn’t make it into today’s roundtable, as a treat.