This article is part of POMEmag Space Week 2017.
Think back to 2015: the year of Our Lady and Savior, Jupiter Jones. That year brought us so much — Channing Tatum stripping in Florida; Channing Tatum rollerblading around space. Truly we were blessed. But as we descend farther and farther into this 2017 hellscape, our hearts collectively yearn for some way to return to that time and that feeling.
Fasten your space-seatbelts kiddos.
I know I’ve been saying forever that there needs to be a twelve part sci-fi novel series dedicated to the extended universe of Jupiter Ascending, so now I’m here to give it to you.
I mean, not literally — well, maybe someday. But for now, just the jacket copy.
Book 1 — Jupiter Ascending
Housemaid Mila Kunis thought she was just an ordinary girl. But soon she discovers that she is, in fact, a Space Princess. With the help of a super hot ex-Legion space werewolf, Caine, and Aegis Marshal, Stinger, she’ll have to travel across the universe to Save The Earth from the evil Abrasax Space Capitalists.
Book 2 — Jupiter Ascending: The Cycle Rebroken
Balem Abrasax is presumed dead after the immense fall from/destruction of the RegeneX refinery on the planet Jupiter, and now his siblings, Kalique and Titus, are squabbling over his inheritance. As the true recurrence of Seraphi Abrasax, Matriarch of the House of Abrasax, all of the power to distribute Balem’s claims lies ultimately with Jupiter. What will she do? Can she trust Kalique and Titus to keep their word and end RegeneX harvesting? And what about her life back home? It’s getting harder and harder to pretend like she doesn’t literally own the Earth.
Book 3 — Jupiter Ascending: Reign
Jupiter slowly comes to understand what it means to own a planet. She begins dismantling the RegeneX harvesting process, BUT that almost entirely devalues her whole portfolio! How can she hope to change Space Capitalism from the inside if she doesn’t have any Space Capital? She finds a surprising ally in Titus’s beautiful assistant, Famulus — and with her, a hope for the future.
Book 4 — Jupiter Ascending: Midnight in Space Petersburg
Her father’s death was no accident. Maximilian Jones, a covert Aegis agent, discovered that Balem Abrasax had been steadily buying out the Legion military forces and using them to protect his financial holdings across the universe. Mr. Jones was silenced by Balem’s mercenaries before he could report these illegal activities to the Aegis headquarters on Orous, and all of the evidence was destroyed with him. Now it’s up to Jupiter to avenge her father by finishing what he started.
Book 5 — Jupiter Ascending: The Seraphi Cycle
Seraphi Abrasax had a complicated 91,000 years — she truly was a bitch, a lover, a child, a mother. Under her mindful care, Abrasax Industries blossomed into the premier RegeneX harvesting operation in the entire universe, yet it was her growing disillusionment with the industry that would come to be her downfall. What caused her to question all she had ever known? And under what circumstances was she really killed?
Book 6 — Jupiter Ascending: Cross
In exposing the Legion’s corruption, Jupiter learns just how direly underfunded the Aegis really is. Even worse: her relationship with Caine has grown strained — Jupiter is caught between the corrupting hand of capitalism and a hard place; trying to juggle the fight against the Legion with the development of her RegeneX alternative, she’s been spending more and more time with Famulus. Are Caine’s greatest fears about to come true?
Book 7 — Jupiter Ascending: People’s Revolution
Jupiter is working to dismantle her inherited empire — to allow the planets independent rule over their own production — when she hears something unbelievable: Balem’s not dead. And now he’s trying to reclaim all that had been taken from him. But Jupiter is remiss to part with her newly freed planets, knowing that if she hands them over, all the work she did to break up the RegeneX harvesting will be reversed. How many strings with she have to pull on Orous to ensure freedom for her people? And will she be able to convince Caine to help her again, after what he thinks she’s done?
Book 8 — Jupiter Ascending: Wings of the Past
Caine’s life before he met Jupiter — his birth as the runt of his Lycantant Splice litter, his time in the Spartan-esque Legion training academy, and the story of how he lost his wings. It includes his first love, a Siberian Husky Splice definitely not named Balto, who was Caine’s academic rival turned lover turned betrayer; as well as the truth behind Balem’s weakened vocal chords.
Book 9 — Jupiter Ascending: Out of the Shadows
Famulus’s betrayal has returned all of the Abrasax siblings to the lavish wealth of their past. Balem uses the restoration of his power to take full control of the Legion and pursue retribution. Caine is learning to trust Jupiter again, and maybe this war is the motivation they need to put aside their hurt feelings and miscommunications and focus on what brought them together in the first place: blowing up Balem’s mercenaries.
Book 10 — Jupiter Ascending: Reckoning
The battle between the Aegis and Balem’s Legion forces comes to a head. Caine volunteers for a dangerous solo mission which may be the key to an Aegis victory; but could Jupiter survive his loss? Meanwhile, Kalique and Famulus find comfort and understanding in each other as they both begin to recognize the evil in Balem and RegeneX.
Book 11 — Jupiter Ascending: Regina Celestia
In the wake of Balem’s defeat, the Commonwealth Ministry dismantles the Legion and restructures the Aegis, providing more funding and better training. The Ministry also creates a new position, the highest honor, for Jupiter — Regina Celestia. But is Jupiter ready to fully leave her life on Earth behind? Things have just gotten back on track with Caine, and she’s not sure she can balance her relationship with him and a responsibility to the entire universe.
Book 12 — Jupiter Ascending: Risen
Jupiter FINALLY takes her permanent place as Queen of Space. She and Caine have grown through their trust issues, and they are stronger (and more virile) than ever — about 70% of this book is just very explicit description of what it is to bone in zero-gravity, as well as how it feels to climax while surveying the vastness of space, which you own. In other news, Kalique and Famulus are helping each other to be better people in this new era of peace, and Titus has been banished to Planet Fuckboy.